Thanks to morning sickness and dehydration Kate and Will's big secret is out, and the world and his wife is camping it up outside a hospital in Marylebone.
The most famous mother-to-be on the globe faces an extraordinary 9 months ahead with the world's media following her every move, and so I thought it only right and proper to blatantly plug my book and Natasha Desborough's.
1.
Staying healthy
It’s essential to stay ahead of the game and be able to out-run every Mummy bore who wants to regale you with their birthing tale. However, if Kate gets cornered she can rely on Marie Mongan’s breathing exercises to keep her calm.
“Hypnobirthing: The Breakthrough to Safer, Easier, More Comfortable Childbirth” by Marie Mongan (£14.99)
2.
Keeping it real
And although Kate has an army of friends and helpers, not all of them will know the answers to questions such as; "why on earth have the maternity police sewn knickers into denim trousers and called them 'maternity jeans'?" or "If I chose the birthing pool, do I have to worry about floaters?"
If The Cap Fits: A Pregnancy Tale by Vikki Rimmer, Published to Kindle (£0.77)(yes - that's me!) is an irreverent guide to the 9 months ahead. Does not contain bootie knitting patterns or smug-pregnancy tales, just honest bouts of vomiting, fear, mad midwives and bumpy sex.
3.
Expectation management
When the world and his wife, and a Queen or two is watching, it’s important to know what to expect. Heidi Murkoff and Sharon Mazel’s ‘What To Expect When You’re Expecting (4th Edition)” (£16.99) will give Kate the head’s up before the head shows.
4.
Choices
"Egbert?” A fine name for a future king!"
“How to choose the best name for your baby” by Holly Ivins (£5.99) should help fuel, what will become a national debate.
5.
Due Date
There may be nanny's on hand, and even a flying Grandma or two, but this tomb will also be a bonus in the first few months when sleep deprivation sets in and it’s hard to decipher the royal behind from the royal elbow. “Your Baby Week by Week: the Ultimate Guide to Caring for Your New Baby” by Simone Cave (£12.99)
And finally…..
When the dust has settled and half the press pack are off chasing Cheryl again, Kate and Will’s will need the help of an expert to guide them through the first few years.
“Parental Advisory Manual” by Natasha Desborough (£9.99) draws on the experiences and confessions of real life mums and dads and uncovers the truth about life with children, what other mothers actually mean and even provides substitute willy names and the top 5 places little boys have put their willies…..
